A Cry From a Zombie
by TasChiBandGirl
Summary: Songfic to Evanescence's "Bring Me To Life". An inner monologue from Kate before a date from Ethan. one-sided Kate/Gordo and K/E. Rated PG-13 for Angst levels


Disclaimer: Lizzie McGuire is owned by Disney, not me. This song is owned by Evanescence, not me. By the way the name of this song is "Bring Me To Life" it's off of the Daredevil Soundtrack. It's an amazing song, I highly recommend everybody reading this fic to listen to this song and it's amazing goodness. This is a Kate/Gordo fic.wow..I wrote a coupling besides Lanny/Matt and Lizzie/Gordo..ooh.breakthrough! This is just a little inner monologue about Kate  
  
A Cry from a Zombie By: TasChiBandGirl  
  
An hour before my big date with Ethan, I'm in my room, just contemplating what I really am. When you, David Gordon, spoke to me this afternoon, I realized something. I realized the big vast of nothing I really am, but how did you know?  
  
How can you see into my eyes  
  
like open doors.  
  
Leading you down into my core  
  
where I've become so numb.  
  
I really don't get it. I wake up every morning, put on a facade along with my makeup, and head off to school. Nobody ever expects anything wrong. I'm popular, pretty, I have boys hanging off of me, but things never seemed right. Yet, he sees it, I know he does, he's the only one who knows me. David Gordon knows me.  
  
Without a soul  
  
my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold  
  
until you find it there and lead it back home.  
  
Gordo, my only savior from this cesspool of self-undoing, why can't I get you? Why can't I just go with you and be whisked away to somewhere new? I'm tired of this life, I want you; not Ethan, just you to lead me back to my former self. The only one who can save me.  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Bid my blood to run.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Before I come undone.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Save me from the nothing I've become.  
  
I need you.I want you..help me. Things I'd scream out onto him, if only I had the courage to. If only, he'd listen. But here I am now, sixteen and lost. I'm nothing, just another face in the crowd, but that's nothing new. Ever since that one summer, where I threw everything I had made myself to be aside for a bra and a chance of belonging.. My insecurities turned me into this shade of nothing, and all I want is for him to save me.  
  
Now that I know what I'm without  
  
you can't just leave me.  
  
Breathe into me and make me real  
  
Bring me to life.  
  
It took me this long to figure it out, he was the one who spoke to me that fateful day. He asked me why I really am this way. He was speaking into my soul, or lack thereof. I never said why, but I know he knows something is wrong. All I want for him to do is just make me real, bring me to my true identity, whatever it may be.  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Bid my blood to run.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Before I come undone.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Save me from the nothing I've become  
  
Nothing.is that all I really am right now? Sure I may have Ethan Craft at my beckoning call, but he's just a tool I use for my own games. The games that nobody understands. The mask that I wear everyday has overcome my true self, and turned me into this nothing. But he knows it. I know he knows it, if only he'd help me, save me, comfort me, if I only I could speak to him. I need to be real again, I'm sick of this vast zone of nothingness inside of me.  
  
Bring me to life.  
  
I've been living a lie  
  
There's nothing inside.  
  
Bring me to life.  
  
Living a lie, yep, that's definitely what I'm doing. I'm pretending I'm this venomous, evil, scathing, popular, pretty teenaged cheerleader. That's what I show myself to be, but really, is there anything inside? I guess not anymore.  
  
Frozen inside without your touch,  
  
without your love, darling.  
  
Only you are the life among the dead.  
  
Without you, Gordo, I'm nothing. Your love, or concern for me is the only thing that's keeping me alive today. I could right now,  
  
All of this I  
  
I can't believe I couldn't see  
  
Kept in the dark  
  
but you were there in front of me  
  
I can't believe I was stupid enough to not realize you knew everything. You knew the real me. I've been in the dark for all this time, slipping away, but you knew it!  
  
I've been sleeping a 1000 years it seems.  
  
Got to open my eyes to everything.  
  
I've been lost without you, and now I've identified my problem, the only problem now is that I need to open my eyes to all that is real about me, whatever it may be.  
  
Without a thought  
  
Without a voice  
  
Without a soul  
  
I've been without any opinions of my own, I've been all alone. Look at me, look at my ugliness. The way I follow the crowd, the way I try to flaunt myself just to gain the respect of my peers, no wonder why your friends hate me, at least you know the truth.  
  
Don't let me die here  
  
There must be something wrong.  
  
Bring me to life.  
  
My plea now is for you to just help me. There is something wrong, actually catastrophic, I'm have no identity, no idea who the real me is, I need you to help me out please! Bring ME to life!!!  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Wake me up inside.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Call my name and save me from the dark.  
  
*Wake me up*  
  
Bid my blood to run.  
  
*I can't wake up*  
  
Before I come undone.  
  
*Save me*  
  
Save me from the nothing I've become  
  
As I stand here, all alone in my room, with tears in my eyes, I realize I'm nothing. I realize only you can save me. I realize a lot of things. I realize I need to be awakened. I need to be saved. But only you, David Gordon, can help me. Only you can wake me up, only you can save me, only you know the real me. Others may claim that I'm just a vast wasteland of nothingness, but you know that I'm screaming for realness, for something. If only you could hear my cries.  
  
Bring me to life.  
  
I've been living a lie  
  
There's nothing inside.  
  
Bring me to life  
  
So here I am now, without a heart, without a home, without a realness to me. Just another zombie in the crowd. Well, I guess it's time for me to put on my mask again and head out tonight. I can't keep Ethan waiting. Maybe, someday, I will become real again. Right now, I'm nothing, until the day you, David Gordon come save me.  
  
So, what did you think? If it's not that good, remember that I'm improving. And once again, I recommend everybody to download this song. It's fantastic! Please Read/Review from the goodness of your own heart! 


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